Yesterday, I saw a teenager dressed as a devil jump out to try and scare a kid dressed as a priest. Without skipping a beat, the priest smacked the devil with his bible, then chased him around screaming, "The power of Christ compels you!" MLIA
Today, my refrigerator was making odd noises that sounded very similar to a dog growling. I stared at it for a bit and then barked at it. To my surprise it stopped immediately. At least my fridge knows who's boss. MLIA.
Today, I was reading a manual for my new power saw. One of the major warnings was, 'May be harmful if swallowed.' You think? MLIA
Since last night was Halloween, my little brother brought home a bunch of candy. Among the chocolates and other candies were those gummy hamburgers. This morning my brother had left me a hamburger that was missing the pink gummy 'patty' piece, and had 2 green 'lettuce' pieces. I appreciate my brothers subtle humor with my vegetarianism. MLIA
Today, I finally managed to say "Piii...kaa.." before I sneezed. I was on the subway, and the guy sitting opposite me started laughing really hard and then went: "Your life is average!" I shall never underestimate the power of this website. MLIA
Tonight I was babysitting. I have been pretty upset about my recent break up with my ex byfriend. When the girl I was babysitting asked me why I looked so sad, I told her that I had just gone through a tough break up. She nodded and left the room. When she returned, she was holding The Sims video game and said "Let's kill him!" Made my night. MLIA
Today, I was passing out candy, and this kid came to the door dressed in completely everyday clothing, while holding an iron. I was confused, and I asked him what he was supposed to be. The answer? Iron man. I was I was awestruck and could only stare at him as he silently took some candy from the bowl I had in my hand. I wish I had that much imagination as a kid. MLIA
I work at a YMCA watching kids in a drop-off area. One woman came in with five kids, two boys, a girl, and a pair of boy-girl twins. Their names? Chuckie, Tommy, Angelica, Phil and Lil. I was overjoyed. MLIA.
Today, I asked an embarrasing personal question to one of my close friends on MSN and they just said “JFGI.” I had never seen that abbreviation used before, so I googled it. Then I laughed… for several minutes. MLIA
Yesterday my friend and I were walking down the stairs in my school when we noticed the bulletin board had a sign that said "Have A Happy Fall!" My friend and I laughed at the irony. Then I promptly fell down the stairs. MLIA
Today for Halloween, I had to pass out candy to the little kids. When I looked to my neighbor's yard, he just left a bucket full of candy with a sign saying "Please take two" and there was a garbage can right next to it. I saw a little kid laugh and try to take a handful, until my neighbor popped out of the trash can in a mask yelling " I SAID TAKE TWO!" The kid ran away crying. This happened about 18 more times. MLIA
Today, I watched the Lion King with my little brother, who had never seen it before. When Nala and Simba were reunited and they were jumping around, he said, "This movie isn't realistic. Lions can't stand on their hind legs!" I politely reminded him that all the animals had been talking the entire movie. MLIA
Today, I dressed up as a Fed-Ex employee for school. As I was taking the stairs to my next class, I saw a guy dressed up as UPS. We had an intense battle on the stairs. I won. MLIA.
Today, I was going to the bathroom when I happened to glance down and see that my pee was blue. I screamed. Then I realized it was toilet bowl cleaner that I'd forgotten to flush. MLIA.
I go to Purdue University and woke up 20 minutes before my class started. Forgetting I was wearing our rival's hoodie, Indiana University, I got on the bus for class. A girl on the bus called me out for it and without missing a beat I told her I was being "stupid" for Halloween. The whole bus applauded. MLIA
Today, in Science class my teacher asked us what we thought of when we heard the word "evolution". I thought of Pokemon, but I didn't say anything. MLIA.
Tonight, I was listening to the radio on my way home. “Heartless” by Kanye West came on, a few seconds into the song, the DJ stopped it and said “just kidding!” and proceeded to play “You Belong with Me” by Taylor Swift. This made my whole day. MLIA
Today, the whole world came crashing down on me, so I got some tape and stuck the map back onto the wall. MLIA
Today, I wanted to comment on a friend's status, but it was only a few seconds old and I didn't want to seem like a stalker. I waited a few minutes and then commented. MLIA
Today, I renamed my iPod "This ship" just for the pleasure of seeing the phrase "This ship is syncing" MLIA
Today I was eating a cupcake when the phone rang. I panicked and stuffed the entire cupcake into my mouth. I still don't know why I did that. MLIA
Today, I was sitting in my room and heard a little boy outside sneeze. I said bless you, and five seconds later, I heard a very hesitant...."God??." MLIA
Today, I got farther with a girl than I ever have before. We ran 10 miles. MLIA.
Today I saw a crunchy looking leaf in the street. I went substantially out of my way in order to step on it. MLIA.
Today I found my ipod, put my earbuds in, and sat down to do my homework. Two hours later, I finished and took my earbuds out. I then realized I had never turned my ipod on. MLIA
Today, on MSN my boyfriend said to me 'You're such an angle', meaning angel. He didn't understand why I replied 'Aww, you're so acute.MLIA
Today while working on a french essay I realized that despite being a 19-year-old university student who has been reading quite competently for many years, I still sing the alphabet every time I need to look up a word in the dictionary. MLIA
Today, my 14 year old brother asked me if I would give him a bottle of vodka for his sleepover. I did. When I came home the bottle was empty and they were all extremely drunk. I still haven't decided whether or not I should tell him it was soda water. MLIA
Today, I began writing a paper that is due tomorrow morning. Instead of writing today's date in the header, I wrote the date it was three days ago to make it seem like I didn't start this last minute. MLIA.
Today, I saw that my ironing board cover was wrinkled. I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because irony has the word iron in it. MLIA
Today for homework we had to combine two animals and descibe our creation. I combined a bee and a ostrich. I named it a beeotch. MLIA.
Today I was watching Aladdin on Disney and realized that when he and Jasmine fly across the world, they pass a background from Hercules and Mulan. My world just exploded. MLIA.
Today, my know-it-all university professor said, "Was is always a verb". I then raised my hand and said, "It's a noun in that sentence...". Never before have I felt so cool. MLIA
haha. okay. That's all for now. Laugh while you can right now :) REMEMBER TO GO TO THE WEBSITE!
I THANK MY COUSIN FOR INTRODUCING ME TO THIS WEBSITE!!!!
XOXO,
Beefballs (yum.) a.k.a. NATALIE LOW JIA WEN !!!! :)
